A Race and a Brother

For those of you who don't know, I joined cross country for the first time this year. This sport always interested me, and it was finally my chance to take part. It had been 2 years since I had run, so it was a rough start. The runs started out easy, and as they progressed got more challenging. Every time I ran, I knew I had to push myself to my absolute limit in order to improve. It was definitely challenging, but it is worth it every single time. 

Running, I've learned, is not all about the physical ability to run, but mostly about the mental state you are in. It is really easy to let the fatigue and cramps convince you to stop, but you have to tell yourself to continue on. While I run, all I can do is talk to God and try to push the thoughts of giving up out from my mind. 

Today, it was a "hard day" which means that we were asked to run at a  six minute(ish) pace. Thankfully, we ran a course of about 4 or so miles, so I was confident. I definitely wasn't in the front of the pack, but I stayed somewhere near the middle, so I knew that I was trying really hard, but I knew I could do better, as well. I pushed myself and pushed myself again, and it was great! 

When I say "great", I'm not saying that I didn't feel any pain, but the way I was performing was pleasing to me. Trying to keep up with the best runners was difficult. I really felt like giving up, but I knew I had to keep trying and push myself harder than I had been previously. When running, I always think of a close friend Ty Williams.

For those of you who don't know who Ty is, he was a great man who happened to be my small group leader. Fortunately, he was more to me than just a small group leader, he was a mentor, friend, and brother. He included everyone in everything he did, and he always had a smile on his face. Unfortunately he isn't here anymore to make jokes with, play ERS, and see every Sunday, but he still finds his way into my life everyday. Ty was a runner, and I know how much it meant to him. When I'm running and feel like I can't go any further, it's like Ty steps in as a coach encouraging me. I get this feeling that he runs right along side me, and it's a feeling that allows me to keep going and never give up.

Anyways, today as I was running, I felt like I couldn't continue on, but I prayed and I asked that God would stay along side me, as well as Ty. With about a mile left, I felt a tingling sensation in my right knee. By the time I had 800 meters left, my knee started to become extremely uncomfortable with pain becoming more and more disturbing by the step. Two or three people passed me, but I knew that I could fight the pain and finish strong... and I did. 

Now why did I share all this with you??? Well because I feel like the sport Cross Country is very much like life, especially the run I had today. Once Christ becomes a part of your life, it isn't the same; it's fantastic. It's like you're on the top of the world, just like the beginning of a run. Nothing is painful, and it seems like you could stay at a fast pace for a while, but soon enough you'll slow down, just like in life. 

The middle part of the run has a lot of ups and downs where you have enough in you to speed up, yet you want to save energy for later, so you aren't running your best. Life, like mentioned before, is just like this. It's very difficult to live a perfect life, so it's impossible to avoid failing. There will always be mountains and valleys, and there will be fast and slow times in life, yet just like in a race or practice, you can't give up and you must make it to the finish line. 

Ahhhh the finish line, such an amazing sight to see after a hard fought race. Our race called life is so difficult, but just like Ty being there supporting me in a run, we have the Holy Spirit, the interceding Holy Ghost. From the moment of acceptance of Christ to the moment of death, the Holy Spirit is with us every step of the way. Even when life takes the worst of turns, He's there, and that's so relieving.

Lastly, the pain in my knee represents the pain of life. The fear, doubt, regret, grief, failure, and much more, all cripple us in our races of life. And the pain of life can sometimes be so crippling that we feel like there is no hope and that no God would give us this pain, but the answer is He didn't. He uses the pain that shows up in our life to test us and see how much oomph we have left in us to finish our race. Just like the few people who passed me in the run, There will be others who excel in their relationship with Christ, but as long as you stick to it, that's all that matters.

Running has taught me more than I could ever imagine, and I'd like to say Thank You to Ty  and my Heavenly Father for being with me every race, practice, and step of the way.  

Jumbled Words of Thanks

I’m sorry to whoever is about to read this, because it probably will make no sense. This post is

basically one of those that is just a jumbled up mess of what I’m feeling. There really is no structure or one true theme, but it’s one that means something to me. Although the words don’t work together to make a sensible piece of writing, I guess it just felt good to get it off my chest.              

 CAUTION: AGAIN, THIS WON'T MAKE SENSE

Thanksgiving is personally one of my favorite holidays, Christmas being the only exception. The only problem I have with this holiday of thanks is the way we “thank”. “Thankful for these people” and “Blessed for all I have” are common phrases sent out over social media, yet what bugs me is that so many people, and I can’t say everyone, but most people just use that because they need a comment on a post instead of it truly meaning something. For all that we have, we should spend a lot more time thanking God for what He has given us instead of worrying about the likes we got on our Turkey Day post on Instagram. And unfortunately, it’s even something I struggle with.

Yesterday, as I was with family, I guess I was just so consumed with a great attitude and enjoying the time with them (which isn't bad) that I didn't really thank God for all I had. There are so many things I am thankful for (family, friends, a good church, a bed, purified water, food in the fridge, a God who’s grace overwhelms me, an intervening Holy Spirit, parents who love each other and don’t fight, good health, and much more) and none of them crossed my mind yesterday.  This brought a terrible feeling in me today, and it’s one I can’t describe, but I know it’s guilt.

With all that God gives me, I can’t even open my bible every day because I “have better things to do.” The crappy feeling that I felt today was so bad, that I had to write this post. I was planning on writing a cliché thanksgiving one about all I was thankful for, but as I began writing, it didn't feel right. I knew I needed to get all I was feeling off my chest.

                

God has truly blessed me with all I have, and I know I can’t ever pay Him back, but it seems like I’m doing nothing to even show any appreciation. I take so much for granted when kids in our own city would do anything to have their mother back after a long fight of cancer. Why is it so hard for me to show my appreciation for what I've received?

As I’m writing this, there is nothing more I want than to worship God with all I have and show my gratitude. I've been listening to SYC music, and I’m not even singing, but it’s like these prayers are flowing out of me just by listening to the songs. That’s one of the reasons I am so thankful for an intervening Holy Spirit. One minute you can be down in the dumps yet the next can feel like you’re on a mountain. Just within writing this, I have gone from a guilt filled heart to one full of joy and gratitude.

                    There is nothing else I can say but “THANK YOU GOD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!”

Overwhelmed with Peace

It usually takes a lot to make people feel overwhelmed; the definition literally has the word “drown” in it. So as I think of what goes on in my life, I wonder how “overwhelmed” I really am. On the days where I feel like nothing is going right and I wonder where God is, I can’t help but feel “overwhelmed.” But I believe that no matter how stressed, anxious, or busy I am, it’s nothing compared to the overwhelming feeling we receive from the Holy Spirit. No earthly thing has the ability to overwhelm us the way our Lord can. When I am feeling anxious and stressed, it seems like I have so much to do that I can’t even think correctly. So what would it take to replace that overwhelming feeling of stress and nervousness with that of peace and grace? It seems impossible, which it is without God, but with God and the Holy Spirit in me, I am sure that thosefeelings can be obliterated.

Philippians 4: 6-7 (NIV) Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God.  And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.

This verse may seem cliché, but every time I feel like I can’t handle the “crap” of this world, this verse comes to mind. It literally tells me to not be anxious and to pray. Prayer is one of my favorite ways to connect with God. One of my spiritual gifts is intercession, which is the gift to pray for others’ needs, and I have always enjoyed talking with the Lord. So if this verse tells me to pray and not hold in feelings of anxiety, then I know that God has my life in control. Jeremiah 29:11 tells us that God knows the plans He has for our lives. What a relief knowing we don’t have to know everything. Philippians goes on to say, in verse seven, that the peace of God will guard our hearts and minds in Christ. Not only are we given peace, but we are protected from those feelings of stress and anxiety in our lives. But then why do we still feel that way sometimes? To be completely honest, I don’t have an answer to that question, but I do know that grace is offered. Just like God offers forgiveness and eternal life, He offers peace. It comes down to free will.

The difficult thing about free will is that it’s our choice. There is no “maybe” or “I will every other Thursday”,but a box checking "yes" or "no." Sometimes it’s so difficult to check that box “yes” when our lives are so full of worldly things. So as an imperfect human, how can we choose to accept all that our fully righteous God gives us? I’m not saying that every day will be an easy walk and that box checked “yes” won't stay constant. What I’m saying is that we have to put forth our best effort. WE ARE A BROKEN RACE, so then that’s the definition of the human race, isn’t it? The one thing to be cautious about is to not allow this to be our excuse to not try.

Colossians 3:23-24 (ESV) “Whatever you do, work heartily, as for the Lord and not for men, knowing that from the Lord you will receive the inheritance as your reward. You are serving the Lord Christ.” 

Our reward for putting our best foot forward is eternal life and a sense of peace. Whether that complete peace lasts a day, an hour, or a minute, it gives us a small glimpse of the eternal peace we will have in heaven.

Fresh Start

Sorry for the inconvenience, but I had to make a new blog since my old one wasn't working out, but I should have a new post coming your way in a couple of days.